Already Gone
by Kiki Warbler
Summary: CrissColfer. Chris leaves, without Darren's knowledge


**A/N: Going a little different route with this. This song has been in my subconscious for awhile, and I've not been brave enough to write it. So…here we go. Song used is 'Already Gone' by Crossfade. I don't own Darren and Chris…I'd like to own Darren for the night, but that's another story!**

_I will not leave a letter nothing at all_

_I'm sure you won't notice that I'm even gone_

_I won't break this silence we've shared for so long_

_I will be strong_

Chris Colfer looked around the apartment and sighed. He knew what he was doing was best for both of them. His boyfriend of two years, Darren Criss, had screwed him over and let him down again. Darren had sworn to him that the last time he'd cheated would be the last time, but here Chris was again, crying into a tissue, and carrying the last of his bags to his car. He turned around and knew it was low, doing it this way, but it had to be done this way. Darren was at work, and Chris had decided that it was now or never for him to leave. It wasn't that Darren had cheated again, it was the opposite of that. Chris knew the dynamic of their relationship had changed, and Darren had assured him that it wouldn't, but he knew it did. With Darren being away for work all the time, Chris felt like he was alone. Darren came home for dinner, spent time with Chris, then went out with whatever friends had asked him to go, or to whatever charity function was happening at that time. Chris always used to joke with him about it on one of those occasions where Darren had to go, and Chris sat at home.

"_Of course you have to go, Dare. You don't know how to say no."_

Chris would say, while Darren pressed his lips to Chris's and would wish they could do this together. Chris just got tired of waiting. This hadn't been an easy decision to come to for him, but he did it. He made the decision. As he got into his car, he sat there and sighed. One part of him should call Darren and tell him what he was doing, but the other part of him didn't care anymore. He was tired, and he just wanted it all to be over. So he drove away, not looking back at the apartment that he'd shared with Darren.

Darren Criss had a feeling that something was wrong, but he shoved it aside. Chris had the day off, and he wasn't due at the studio today. Darren was leaving early from the set to go home and make Chris an amazing dinner. He knew that things had changed since Chris had caught him kissing Mia, but he had changed. Darren knew how much Chris loved him, and how much he loved Chris, and his heart broke constantly over knowing what he'd done to Chris. He had been trying to make it up to him, but they were so busy, they hardly saw each other anymore. He knew that was why their relationship was difficult to maintain, because Darren was always running somewhere. He was putting a stop to that. His publicist had to know that his relationship was important to him and he wouldn't let anything step in the middle of that. So, he decided that he was going to show Chris that he was making the effort. He noticed that Chord Overstreet was heading over to him, and Darren smiled. He and Chord were close, because they were both creative people.

"Hey dude, you got plans for tonight? Nash and the boys are in town, and I know Chuck and Freelance are here. I was thinking jam session."

"Nah dude, thanks though. I've got to spend some time with Chris tonight. I've got to. I feel so bad. I've been running all over the place lately and haven't had like more than an hour to spend with him."

"Well, that sucks. You guys are so glued at the hip. Maybe next time then."

"Definite raincheck. But tell Nash I said what up."

Darren said, as Chord slapped him on the back and walked away. Darren felt good about telling Chord no. Darren went over to stand next to Adam Shankman and smiled when he got some direction. Only a few short hours, and he'd be home.

_I will not leave a letter nothing at all_

_I'm sure you won't notice that I'm even gone_

_Why did I stay here stay for so long_

_When we're so far gone_

_I feel so stupid taking this fall_

_I should have seen it known all along_

_I won't break this silence we've shared for so long_

_I will be strong_

"Yeah Ash, I left him."

Chris said into the phone. He knew how ridiculous he'd sounded over that, but he needed his best friend to know that he wasn't messing around with it this time. But Ashley wasn't on his side, not this time. Normally he could count on Ashley Fink to be there for him, but today wasn't one of those days.

"Are you serious? Because Darren deserves more than that, Chris. Things are hard for you guys, but he's shown you just how much he loves you. He's recommitted himself to you. He made a stupid mistake, and yeah, he was drunk, and you know that."

"Why are you on Darren's side, Ash?"

"Because, I see how you two are together. You're so good together it's crazy. You just need to stick it out some more."

"No, I can't do it. He's never home. He's on set until late tonight, and I know Nash Overstreet and his band are in town. And Chuck's been pressuring Dare to come and see him, without me. We all know that Chuck is against me and Dare being together. I feel bad for breaking Chuck Sr and Cerina's hearts though. They're like an extension of me."

"Have you called Cerina and told her yet?"

"No. I'm waiting for Darren to see that I'm gone. He probably won't notice. He's probably going to end up going somewhere."

"Okay, but that still doesn't mean that you have to ignore him, or sneak out, or whatever. You need to tell him about it."

Chris was flabbergasted. His best friend was taking his boyfriend's-no, _ex-_boyfriend-he mentally corrected himself, side and he didn't know what to say. He needed someone to tell him he was making the right decision.

"I can't, because he'll find a way to keep me there. And I swear to god, Ashley. I can't. I love him. I think part of me will always love him, but I just can't love him as passionately as I used to anymore."

Ashley sighed on the other end of the phone and shook her head to nobody in particular. She knew Chris was in a rough way right now, and being as her best friend needed a place to stay for the time being, she knew she'd do it.

"Well honey, you know you can stay with me for awhile if you need it. Didn't you keep your apartment though?"

"I sublet it. I was actually going back there, because the people moved out. I'm gonna move back in and take the listing off the market. But thanks though, honey. I appreciate it."

"What happens when Darren goes over there?"

"Then we'll talk, but I've gotta go. We'll talk soon."

Chris said, hanging up. He was certain he was making the right decision. He was for sure he was. But a little piece of him was dying inside. He smiled and looked over at Brian the cat. He pet Brian through his cat carrier and smiles.

"We're making the right decision, buddy."

Chris said, pulling up in front of his apartment. He didn't need any more convincing on the matter. He was in the right, and he knew it. He smiled as he started unloading his car, while he was on the phone with his real estate agent. He knew some work might need to be done, but it wasn't work he hated to do. It would take his mind off of Darren. And that's what he needed. A momentary distraction from the hazel eyed god that had become his life.

_What could you possibly want from me_

_Can't you see I'm already gone_

_Everything we thought we'd be_

_I still don't feel sorry for this loss_

Darren arrived at the apartment an hour or so after Chris had left it, and the feeling hadn't gotten any better. He walked into the foyer and smiled. He noticed the picture and fingered it softly. It was of them after one of his performances. His arms were wrapped around Chris's waist and Chris's head was on his shoulder. It was a little intimate for them in public, but that's why he loved it so much. He dropped his keys on the table and walked a little further in.

"Babe, I'm home! You here?"

He poked his head into the living room and because normally when he got home, Chris was there with his laptop on his lap, trolling Twitter or editing a chapter, but Chris wasn't there. Darren looked at the flashing light on the answering machine. He tapped the button and heard the messages. One was from Karyn and Tim. They were flying down this weekend and would love to see us. He needed to check his schedule and make sure that things were gonna be okay before he called them to schedule the visit. The next message was from Joey whining about how they hadn't seen each other since Michigan had played Alabama, and that was the first game of the season. He chuckled and made a mental note to call him back, but before he could end the messages, the last one came through, and he knew that his world had come crashing down.

"Hi Chris, this is Holly Jacobs. Your apartment is in the free and clear. The listing has been taken off the market, and you're free to move back in at anytime. I'll call you on your cell."

Darren heard the beep but he was planted to the floor. It was Chris's real estate agent. And the apartment was empty? Something clicked in Darren's brain and he ran from the living room up to their bedroom. He opened the chest of drawers and that's when he saw that they were empty. He walked to the closet and opened the door. Chris's side was empty. There was nothing there. Darren knew. He'd had a feeling all day that something bad was going to happen. And he knew that he was at fault for it. He sat down on his bed and dropped his head in his hands and started to cry. There was no coming back from this one, and that was the truth.

_I will not waste a moment thinking these thoughts_

_Forgetting comes easy_

_I never cared at all_

_Hurt became hate now I'm feeling the strain_

_There's just too much pain_

_Falling to pieces get swept away_

_Left all our pictures some to fade_

_I won't break this silence we've shared for so long_

_I will be strong_

_What could you possibly want from me_

_Can't you see that I'm already gone_

_Everything we thought we'd be_

_I still don't feel sorry for this loss_

That was the fourth time in fifteen minutes that his cell phone had rung. He knew who it was. He also knew that he should answer the phone, but couldn't bring himself to do it. Darren must've gotten home. He also knew that Darren might've also heard the message from Holly about the apartment. That's what scared him more, was Darren's reaction. He knew that he should tell Darren how he was feeling, but the fact that he'd moved back into his apartment was plenty enough. But he did need to talk to him, so on the fifth time that the phone rang, he answered it.

"Hello?"

"Chris! I have been trying to call you. You're ignoring my calls again. I know, I deserve it. Trust me, I know…but you left without telling me. Without saying goodbye."

"I had to leave, Dare. Things haven't been good between us for awhile now. You're always off on some excursion with one of your friends. We haven't had a romantic dinner together in awhile, and I'm sad about that. But what I'm most sad about, is that I love you so much, and I had to do it."

"Please, Chris…please just come home and talk to me about this. I don't feel comfortable doing it over the phone. I love you, so much. And I promised that I would forever. Please Chris, please come back."

Chris's heart was breaking at the pain in Darren's voice. He knew he had to stay strong though. He couldn't pack up and leave strictly because he couldn't handle it. But he had to stay his ground. He had to.

"Darren, do you not understand why I moved out? Do you not get it? I've forgiven you for making out with Mia, Dare. But I've been miserable for awhile because we haven't spent time together. It seems like all you do is work, and go to charity functions. And I want to be with the man I love, but the man that I love wants to go out with his friends. I want to go public Dare. I'm ready. And I know you are, but how can you want to be with me when you can't decide whether or not to wear socks."

Darren chuckled at that statement, but he understood where Chris was coming from. He knew that he was a people person. That's all he needed to do. He was an up and coming actor. He needed all the exposure he could get. But he also didn't want to sacrifice his relationship to do it. And it was at this moment he realized it was too little, too late.

"So, that's it then? You're gonna give up on me, because I need to stay relevant? Because I need to keep my career on a hot streak? I'm not saying I'm proud of making the sacrifices I've made for that. But I'm not giving up on us. There's still enough time for us."

"It's too late. Darren, please don't make this any harder than it is. I'm so sad right now, it isn't funny. I'm sad that I'm losing you. All I want to do is get back into my car and pretend like nothing happened and drive back home to you. But I can't do that, Dare. I can't. I can't let my brain win this time. I can't excuse it. It's over, Darren…and the sooner you can accept that, the sooner we'll all be able to make it work."

Darren shook his head, and sobbed into the phone. He couldn't do it. He couldn't lose Chris, and he wouldn't. He'd accept that Chris left him, but he'd fight like hell to get him back. And he was telling Chris exactly that.

"I'll accept that we're over…for now. But dammit, Chris. I'm gonna fight for us. I'm gonna prove it. I have changed, Chris. Always. But I'm gonna prove it."

Darren said, and he knew he'd fight harder than before to win Chris back. He hung up with Chris and knew. He was gonna get his man back, and he was gonna die trying.

_You don't have to say anything at all_

_I won't stop you from walking away_

_I'll do nothing at all_

_Sitting here I waste a day_

_While the memories fade away_

_You know I expected so much more from you_

**A/N: It hurt to write! But there is a sequel in mind…if I can move CrissColfer (my iPod) off of it's need to play 'Beauty School Dropout' on repeat. **


End file.
